Question: What did you do all day Saturday, Deborah?
Answer: Cut the lights off a pre-lit Christmas Tree.
True story. About eight years ago when I purchased The Perfect Christmas Tree, I wondered; How long will the strands of lights work, being stored in an outdoor shed in the MIDDLE OF THE DESERT? Apparently about three years. So I gradually started adding lights each year as another strand would go out; but I never removed the original PRE-LIT lights. This year, SPC Ryan is coming home from Iraq for Christmas with his fiancée. Who he told that His Mother does Christmas Wonderland every year. SO. I decided it was time to cut off the nonfunctioning lights. And add new LED white lights.
Seven hours later, this is what I had. SEVEN HOURS (7). S-e-v-e-n H-o-u-r-s.
Question: How do they get lights on a pre-lit tree?
Answer: They use experimental rats from a meth lab.
True story. Experimental rats from a meth lab are given cheese coated strings of lights and set loose within the trees. I know this because I spent SEVEN HOURS cutting the most intricate rats nests of wires from underneath each branch.
On a Happy Note:
The Tree is fluffier than it has ever been.
24 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! AAAAAAAHHHH! I saw the jumbled mass of lights on the first photograph and I burst out laughing. HAHAHAHAHAHA! OMG! Ahhhh. I will set up mine after Thanksgiving. I can't rememebr where I stored mine. OMG what about the attics in Texas? I wonder if my lights will still work. Ah Christmas. I love Thanksgiving and Christmas. Oh Deborah. What a day you had!
NOOOO! You mean it gets worse? Oh no! Well, I am not going to be laughing then. I thought it is over and we can laugh.
On your question about the Viking, I hope not. However, what I would give to have an 18 year old Viking except I'll be under-aged then and he'll get in trouble.
Surely the Christmas decorating saga is over?
Oh what hard work! Cant wait to see it when its all newly lit and decorated!
Wow seven hours! That's a lot of work.
Haha it's Christmas all year 'round at my house. I set up our artificial tree years ago and we haven't taken in down since. . . we talk about it, but it's in our atruim and we just don't take it down xD
You're crazy....
(It's too early...had to delete the first due to tons of typos....)
This gives me a new perspective on the prelit I bought last year (that is so big it comes in sections and DH has to help me get it put together---NOT going up this year!) as I have it tucked safely in a climate controlled basement studio.
It had better last longer than seven years, especially with what I paid.....or I'm going after the meth lab rats!!!!
And, ummmmm, yes, I was laughing like Ces......BAD ANNE!!!! LOL!!!!!
I could not have done it; I would have bought a new tree and pummelled the old one just for fun.
XXOO!!
Anne
Oh my goodness! So sorry to hear you had to go through that...I think I would have given up after the first couple of hours~ ;)
Can't wait to see ho you decorate it!!!
We all love you and your spirit. I am so glad Ryan is coming home to a wonderland. You deserve all the best.
xoxox
yesterday I dusted. I really thought of lwaving the dust and consider them snow flurries except they were thick and people thought there may have been a blizzard. Deborah, I am the world's worst housekeeper. Hestia is frowning at me.
Sorry all I could hear and see in my mind is that Ryan is coming home for Christmas with his fiance.
Wonderful and so exciting.
Please Deborah let me know when he is on American soil, because him being away makes me a nervous wreck.
Love Renee xoxo
Holy smokes Deborah!!! that looks like a lot of work!!! wowwwwwwwwwwwww!!! but the tree looks wonderful and I have to get everything organized here for the Holidays too!!! thanks for the inspiration!!!
Hugssssssssssssssss
Diana
Thank you very much Deborah. I like the new title too. How coincidental. Manon just called me and told me that she is sending me 300 more cards!
Oh...I have a headache! Let's see $50 bucks and hour times 7.....
It does look fluffy!
And congrats on the boy and his gal coming home!
But we are not having a contest, are we? If so, you win!
Oh I love you Deborah, you made me laugh so hard. I could just see you cutting off each and every strand just like a ninja. You are such a good mom!!!
xo-jj
Well then if we are talking about adorableness you win because just look at the hair, the hair! First item - I fail.
hey Deb, thanks for letting me know the link isn't working for you. It works for me when I click on here. What happened when you tried it?
Darling Funny Wire Entangled Lovely One~
This post. I laughed til I cried. I am at work. I soooo needed this.
Meth lab rats. Sometimes, I feel like one.
You are too funny!
LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL
XOXOXOXOXOXOX
I am a recent follower of your blog. You are so real and so funny and so deep. The christmas lights have always been the bane of my existence so at the beginning photo you had my attention. SEVEN Hours. You are a better man than me Gunga Din. Laughing and loving it, Linda in New Mexico
*kisskiss* back at ya Deborah...Thank you
xoxoxo
Where's the tree? Where's the tree?
Ha ha ha!!!! I like that!!! Did you enjoy a bit of eggnog while unraveling the tree/lights? I think I may have passed up the eggnog and just gone for the bottle of Brandy, oh wait! I don't drink Brandy...tee hee!!!!!
Love Me
By the way it will never be just you, because I will always be with you.
Love Renee xoxo
i read this out loud to my hubby, moreover, I read it out loud with a voice that I am supposed to be resting because of a sore throat.. ...
hahhaha.. it does look very fluffy... and very much the perfect tree...
glad they are coming home ;)
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