Wednesday, September 17, 2008

A Greatful Heart

Dear PVT Ryan,

I love this picture of you. You were 19 months old. I wish I remembered what had you so surprised, but it was a busy time with having you and a newborn...

My heart is ever so grateful today. Last night was a bad night for neighbors dealing with their drug-addicted child. I am so proud of you for winning your battle. You beat great odds and have grown into a wonderful young man. It occurred to me that your recovery was much like childbirth for me. It seemed to last forever and so often I just wanted to give up...begging and pleading with God, let's make a deal...and suddenly, it was over...just that simply. Not a winding down. An END.

In spite of the six year battle, We Were Family. There was always so much love. And here we are, all still together, still family. We are fiercely LOYAL.

I have decided to rewrite Our Story...for I have learned all I needed to learn from the pain. I am grateful to God for giving me such a child who sanded off layers and layers of preconceived notions of what life was all about...a child who taught me to be essential...a child who reduced me to LOVE. I am on a journey now to document All The Love that you have brought into my life. I no longer need to remember the pain. I remember you. I remember the weight of your body on my chest, my new born baby boy. I remember your first words, steps, every single school year, every concert, every ball game, Christmas, Easter and Halloween.

I remember you and I remember love.

1 comment:

Renee said...

And the rest of it is gone.

There is a new life now and that is what matters. The hope and the love not the pain and the disgust.

I love that we are learning each others truths.

God bless Ryan and the family.

God bless mothers who won't give up on their children.

Love Renee xoxoxo